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Listen Then Speak: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Jahmaal Marshall
Our desire is to sit and chop it up with anyone from best selling authors to successful entrepreneurs and get a sense of the highs and lows of their journey. We want to delve past the surface to see how their culture, faith, career choices, and mental health have brought them to their current destination and broach topics that will provoke both thought and action in listeners.
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- 1 weeks ago21 min
Always Ready for War: The Fight Response in High Performers
Time Stamps01:10 -The 5 stress responses: where fight fits after fawn and flight02:30 -James 1:19: swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath03:00 -What the fight response looks like in high performers05:15 -How the fight response shows up in men06:45 - How the fight response shows up in women08:00 -The root causes: "Who told you that you had to fight?"10:00 - Solution 1: Catch the surge before you swing11:15 - Solution 2: Ask what the anger is guarding12:15 -Solution 3: Practice strength under control13:30 - Join Unprogrammed on Skool and work with JahmaalKey takeawaysThe fight response is your nervous system deciding a threat can be beaten. In leaders, it often gets rewarded and mistaken for being "direct."In men, fight often shows up as open anger, dominance, and needing to win, because anger was the one emotion they were allowed to show.In women, fight often goes underground: control, cold competence, sharp criticism, and anger turned inward.The core belief: "If I'm not in control, I'm not safe."Three roots: a home where you had to defend yourself, respect that had to be earned in combat, and unprocessed hurt underneath the anger.Three solutions: catch the surge before you swing, ask what the anger is guarding, and practice strength under control through letting go and repair.Join UnprogrammedUnprogrammed is Jahmaal's newest community on Skool for high performers ready to break old programming: the fight, the flight, the fawn, and the beliefs underneath them. Live masterclasses, Q&A with Jahmaal, and a community of leaders doing the same work. Join here: https://getunprogrammed.com/unprogrammed Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
- 2 weeks ago16 min
Why Can’t I Relax? The Flight Response in High Achievers
Join Jahmaal’s Skool community today!skool.com/unprogrammed-4053/aboutIf you're ready to get measured results for both personally and professionally, schedule an appointment with JahmaalBook your Root Cause Intensive today!https://calendly.com/listenthenspeak/the-rewire-roadmap-clone-1 Being busy can look like ambition, but sometimes it’s a way to avoid what we don’t want to feel.In this week’s episode of Listen Then Speak, Jahmaal explores the flight response in high performers. It can show up as overwork, perfectionism, constant planning, or always moving on to the next goal. Jahmaal looks at how these patterns can take shape, how they may show up differently for men and women, and why staying busy doesn’t always bring the rest we’re looking for. Episode Highlights:0:00 - Intro0:59 - The flight response and high performers2:46 - When busyness looks like drive4:13 - How flight can show up in men and women6:29 - Where the pattern begins8:21 - The connection between burnout and unprocessed pain8:52 - Three ways to start changing the pattern9:38 - Practicing stillness in small doses11:24 - Facing what you’ve been avoiding12:14 - Episode wrap-up13:07 - Jahmaal’s new community for high performers14:04 - A preview of the next episode: the fight responseCONNECT WITH JAHMAALLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jahmaalmarshall/Website: https://listenthenspeak.com/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ListenThenSpeakPodBUY ME A Coffee - with this link: https://buymeacoffee.com/listenthenspeak?new=1 Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
- Oct 1, 202626 min
How to Stop People Pleasing at Work: The Fawn Response in High Achievers
If you're ready to get measured results for both personally and professionally, schedule an appointment with JahmaalBook your Root Cause Intensive today! https://calendly.com/listenthenspeak/the-rewire-roadmap-clone-1 Sometimes what looks like being dependable is really a stress response in disguise.In this solo episode, Jahmaal unpacks the fawn response and why high performers can spend years being rewarded for patterns that are actually rooted in people-pleasing, fear, and the need to keep everyone else comfortable.He gets into how those patterns take hold, why they can be so hard to recognize, and what it looks like to start interrupting them in real life.It’s a conversation about learning to stop treating other people’s approval like a requirement for your own peace. Episode Highlights: 0:00 - Intro0:25 - When your body says no but you still say yes1:05 - Introducing the five stress responses4:20 - Fight, flight, freeze, flop, and fawn5:37 - What the fawn response actually is6:01 - Why fawning can look like excellence7:03 - Signs of fawning in high performers8:50 - How fawning can show up differently in women10:47 - How fawning can show up differently in men13:18 - The belief underneath people-pleasing14:21 - Where the fawn response can begin16:09 - Becoming “the responsible one” too early17:06 - When faith, culture, or family encourage self-erasure18:42 - Three ways to start breaking the pattern18:52 - Create a gap before saying yes19:52 - Trace the belief back to its source20:56 - Practice small, safe disappointments23:14 - What healthy boundaries actually mean CONNECT WITH JAHMAAL LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jahmaalmarshall/Website: https://listenthenspeak.com/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ListenThenSpeakPod BUY ME A Coffee - with this link: https://buymeacoffee.com/listenthenspeak?new=1 Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
- Sep 17, 202649 min
From Shaken Faith to Unshakeable Faith: Finding Strength Through Grief w/ Aaron Graham
If you're ready to get measured results for both personally and professionally, schedule an appointment with Jahmaal Pastor Aaron Graham joins me to talk about his new book, Unshakeable Faith, and why writing it required him to confront his own fear of conflict. Aaron is the founder and lead pastor of The District Church, a multicultural congregation in Washington, DC, representing more than 80 nations. He has spent over 15 years pastoring in the nation’s capital and holds a master’s degree in public policy from the Harvard Kennedy School. Our conversation centers on what happens when grief, fear, and disappointment go unprocessed. We talk about the doubts that can emerge after a painful loss, the church’s response to racial injustice, and the pressure to choose a political side rather than remain grounded in your convictions. Aaron also shares why justice requires more than spare change, how online outrage affects our interior lives, and what it looks like to hold onto both conviction and compassion in a deeply divided world. Episode Highlights:0:00 - Meet Pastor Aaron Graham4:02 - Why Aaron wrote Unshakeable Faith8:12 - The deeper emotion underneath fear10:40 - Faith, doubt, and life-changing loss12:34 - How unprocessed grief can become anxiety19:22 - Deconstruction, racial justice, and the church27:19 - Why justice requires more than spare change30:21 - Connecting personal grief with meaningful action38:21 - Cancel culture and divisive online voices40:41 - Maintaining relationships across differences47:36 - The courage to be fully known and loved CONNECT WITH JAHMAAL LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jahmaalmarshall/ Website: https://listenthenspeak.com/ BUY ME A Coffee - with this link: https://buymeacoffee.com/listenthenspeak?new=1 Interested in learning more about Aaron Graham? Book: Unshakable Faith: How to Stand Firm in a Culture of Lies. Personal Website: aarongrahamdc.com Church Website: districtchurch.org instagram.com/DistrictChurch https://www.aarongrahamdc.com/difficultconversations Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
- Sep 9, 202625 min
Wise as Serpents: How to Deal With the Snakes in Your Life
Why "just cut them off" is the wrong first moveHere's the contrarian part, and it's the part most people skip. Every piece of advice online tells you the same thing: identify the toxic person, go no-contact, block, delete, done. And sometimes distance is exactly right. But cutting someone off doesn't answer the harder question, the one underneath the wound: Who told you that you had to keep the snake fed? If you keep ending up with the same viper in a different body: new job, same manipulator; new relationship, same betrayal; the problem isn't your bad luck. It's a belief you've been carrying that says your worth is measured by how much you'll tolerate. You call it being loyal. You call it being the bigger person. You call it keeping the peace. But high-functioning codependency wears respectable clothes, and it will keep you seated at the table of someone who's already decided you're the meal. You can remove every snake in your yard. If you never ask why the door keeps getting left open, another one is already on the way. How to spot a snake before it strikesDiscernment isn't paranoia. It's paying attention to patterns instead of performances. In the episode, Jahmaal walks through the tells: They're fluent in your weaknesses and forgetful of your worth. A snake studies where you're soft, and files it for later.They move differently in public than in private. Psalm 140:3 talks about tongues sharp as a serpent's. Watch what the tongue does when the audience leaves.Confusion is the residue. You leave conversations doubting your own memory. That fog isn't an accident, it's the venom.They reward your silence and punish your honesty. In a healthy relationship, the truth brings you closer. Around a snake, the truth gets you bitten. If you've been calling this "just a difficult person," this section will cost you your comfortable label. Good. Clarity is the first mercy. The wisdom to deal with toxic people (personally and professionally)Personally, the snake counts on your history. "But we go way back." "But that's my family." "But they were there for me once." Loyalty is a virtue, until it becomes the very thing that keeps you kneeling. Professionally, the snake counts on your ambition. You don't confront it because you need the reference, the promotion, the peace of not "making it a thing." So you swallow it. And swallowed venom doesn't disappear; it becomes burnout, resentment, and a body that starts sending you the bill. The wisdom Jahmaal offers isn't a script for a comeback. It's a shift in posture: stop managing the snake and start leading yourself. You don't need them to change for you to stop bleeding. The 3 moves: how to deal with the snakes in your lifeThis is the heart of the episode: three moves, in order. Skip one and the whole thing collapses.1. Take inventoryYou can't confront what you refuse to count. Get honest about who's actually in your circle and what they cost you. Not who you hoped they'd be; who they've shown you they are, on repeat. Write the names. Notice how your body feels before you see them, not just after. Inventory isn't cruelty; it's stewardship. You can't protect a garden you've never walked.2. Take ownershipHere's where it gets holy and uncomfortable. The snake is responsible for the bite. But you are responsible for the access. Ownership means asking the "Who told you?" questions: Who told you that keeping the peace was your job? Who told you love means unlimited access? Who told you that saying no makes you the villain? You didn't choose the first snake. But somewhere along the way you learned to leave the gate open, and what you learned, you can unlearn.3. Make a planWisdom without a plan is just a nice feeling that fades by Monday. Decide (before the next encounter) what you will and won't allow. What the boundary is. What you'll say. What access gets revoked, what stays, and what the consequence is when it's crossed. A boundary you haven't rehearsed is a boundary you'l
- Aug 31, 202619 min
Why Rejection Is Protection: When God Closes a Door, Stay Out of the Room
The One Line That Changes Everything Sometimes the door didn't close on you. It closed for you. If you're a high-achiever who's been taught that every "no" is just a "not yet" you can grind your way past, this episode is your permission slip to do something your ambition has never allowed: stay excluded. Because the burnout you're carrying? It's rarely the workload. It's the chasing, the emotional overtime you're logging trying to earn your way back into a room God already walked you out of. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why burnout is almost never about doing too much — and what's actually draining you The difference between being rejected and being removed (and why it matters) 4 real-life examples of rejection being protection in disguise What Scripture says about closed doors, betrayal, and repositioning The one question that turns exclusion into freedom instead of exhaustion Rejection Isn't the End of Your Story: It's the Repositioning Here's the pattern most high-performers miss: rejection is often protection wearing a mask you don't recognize yet. You keep knocking. You keep over-explaining. You keep proving yourself to people who already decided. And you call it perseverance, but your body is calling it burnout. The truth is, when you keep trying to re-enter rooms you were excluded from, you don't just waste energy. You override the very protection that exclusion was built to give you. "You weren't rejected. You were removed. And there's a difference, because man looks at the door, but God looks at what's on the other side of it." Ready to Pull the Root Out? If this episode named something you've been living, the exhaustion of trying to break back into a room God locked for your good, don't sit with that revelation alone. That's exactly the work we do inside the Premium Strategy Hour. One hour, just you and me. We go underneath the burnout, find the belief that keeps you chasing closed doors, and pull it out by the root. I only open a handful of these each month. When they're gone, they're gone, so don't wait for the next season of exhaustion to make the decision for you. Book Your Premium Strategy Hour - HERE Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
- Aug 22, 202616 min
The Blessing Buried in the Betrayal: How to Recover From Burnout That Rest Won't Fix
What You'll Learn in This Episode Why executive burnout is usually a betrayal problem, not a workload problem The difference between betrayal as destruction and betrayal as revelation How high-functioning codependency and over-giving accelerate burnout in high-achievers The origin belief driving your disordered boundaries - and how to find it The six-step L.I.S.T.E.N. Method for moving through betrayal Concrete personal and professional steps to reclaim your energy and worth Burnout Isn't a Workload Problem - It's a Betrayal Problem The exhaustion that sleep doesn't touch and a vacation only reschedules isn't about your calendar. It's about a betrayal you've been staying busy enough to avoid feeling. Somebody crossed you; a partner, a mentor, a company you bled for, a parent. Instead of grieving it, you got useful. You made yourself indispensable so you'd never be discardable again. That isn't ambition. It's a survival strategy in business casual. Key insight: Burnout in leaders is rarely about doing too much. It's about doing too much for people who wouldn't do the same for you, while some part of you knew it the whole time. Betrayal Is Not Destruction - It's Revelation Genesis 50:20 gives the whole framework. Joseph tells the brothers who sold him: "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good." He doesn't deny the harm. He names the intent, and refuses to let their intent write the final sentence. Betrayal doesn't build the crack. It reveals the crack that was already there - in the relationship, the agreement, or the story you were told about your own worth. Underneath the Scripture is the neuroscience: your nervous system logged the betrayal as a threat and went into protection - over-function, over-give, say yes when you mean no. That pattern is high-functioning codependency, and it's the number one accelerant of burnout in high-achievers. Key Takeaways Burnout that rest won't fix is often unprocessed betrayal. Betrayal reveals a pre-existing crack; it doesn't create it. Over-functioning is a survival response, not a personality trait. Healing is internal — it never requires the other person's apology. The L.I.S.T.E.N. Method works the root belief, not just the symptom Ready to Work the Root? If you can feel the origin belief but can't quite reach it alone, that's exactly the work of the Premium Strategy Hour. One focused hour: we locate the origin, name the belief, and build the boundary you've needed for years, the one that ends the over-functioning at the root. These are deliberately limited, and only a handful open each month. When they're gone, they're gone until the next window. Claim your Premium Strategy Hour → Listen deeply. Speak boldly. Do the work. Connect Subscribe to Listen Then Speak on Apple Podcasts and Spotify or wherever podcast are distributed. If this episode named something you've been carrying, share it with one leader who needs it. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
- Aug 13, 202616 min
Why You Can't Accept a Compliment -- And What It's Doing to Your Brain Chemistry
Listen to the Episode Someone praises your work and your hands are up before they finish the sentence. "It was a team thing." "It was nothing." You think you're being humble. In this solo episode, executive coach and certified counselor Jahmaal Marshall takes you underneath the reflex — to the subconscious origin belief that's been writing your brain chemistry, driving your over-functioning, and manufacturing a burnout no vacation ever seems to fix. This is root-cause work, not surface-level advice. If you've ever felt successful on the outside and quietly depleted on the inside, this one's the mirror. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why a compliment can feel like a threat - the nervous-system reason your body braces, squirms, and deflects when you're praised The core belief hiding underneath the deflection: "I'm only worthy when I'm useful" - and where it got installed How high-functioning codependency and people-pleasing keep you running a reward system that can spend but can't receive The chemistry of burnout: why nothing you accomplish is ever allowed to count Emotional neglect of self, masked as empathy - the survival radar you were taught to call a gift Why you can't behavior-modify your way out of a belief-level pattern, and what actually moves it at the root For HR, Founders & Talent Acquisition Leaders The way you frame yourself isn't private, it's a broadcast. Deflect your value and you train the room to value you exactly as little as you value yourself. Fix the belief, and your framing changes on its own; and so does how you're perceived, paid, and promoted. That's not confidence you fake. That's alignment. Take the Next Step If something in your chest went "that's me," that's the invitation. Come do the root-cause work inside 12 Weeks of Transformation and stop leaking your worth into a system that only knows how to take it. [Book a conversation with Jahmaal / Start 12 Weeks of Transformation] → Visit: listenthenspeak.com → Or DM the word CLARITY on Linkedin to check availability This is not a sales call. It is strategic, honest, and built for people who are done with insight without implementation. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
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About Listen Then Speak
Our desire is to sit and chop it up with anyone from best selling authors to successful entrepreneurs and get a sense of the highs and lows of their journey. We want to delve past the surface to see how their culture, faith, career choices, and mental health have brought them to their current destination and broach topics that will provoke both thought and action in listeners.
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